Knowing When to Let Go.

Once, in sparring, my partner grabbed my arms with his hands. He smiled slightly, considering his advantage. I stepped back into a horse stance pulling him off balance, then kicked him in the gut with a lead leg sidekick. It was light contact, so he squeezed tighter. I shuffle stepped towards him, hooking my lead leg behind his ankle and shifted to a bow and arrow stance. This caused him to fall backwards. Still he held on, pulling me down on top of him. Now that I was on top, I freed my right arm and punched him in the side of the head, then freed my left and punched him in the jaw on the other side.

He didn't know when to let go, and so kept getting himself into more and more of a predicament.

Often life throws challenges, hurts, injuries and insults our way. There is a time to hold tight and fight, but there is also a time to let go.

Several years ago, my mother and father paid me a visit. My then fiancee, and now wife cooked them dinner. The reason they had come was to tell me that my Mom had been diagnosed with cancer. They had a plan for how to fight the cancer, but the odds were against her. The only thing in my power to do was to support her in her battle.

As time went on, the cancer progressed, there came a point when my mother knew the battle was lost. She chose to let go of it.

I got married at her house, three months before my planned wedding. My mom passed away a week later.

Part of me still holds on to the grief and pain. Part of me is still angry at that disease that took my mother from me.

Every time I feel that way, and find myself holding on to the anger, I have to remind myself to let go of it.

Anger won't bring her back, and it won't heal me.

I let go of the negative feelings over and over again. I hold on to the love she showed me throughout my life, to the memories, to all that she gave me. I hold on to all I learned from her, and I share that with my wife and children.